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Day One

This time feels different. I'm not sure exactly why. Perhaps it's because I got so incredibly drunk last night (for no reason) that I blacked out (for the first time.) Or maybe it's because all those sobriety related audio books and podcasts I've been listening to are finally sinking in. Perhaps it's because my son is in rehab and it just f****** feels wrong to keep living like this while he's struggling. Maybe it feels different because it's spring and the season naturally feels hopeful. Perhaps it's because I'm getting married in less than a month and I'm tired of disappointing the man I love so much. Or as my therapist said earlier today, maybe it's Divine timing. 

 Whatever the reason, I'm calling it. This is officially day one of NO MORE PINOT. The sobriety tracker on my phone is ticking and I am determined to not reset it as I've done countless times over the past two years. I have to do this now. And for whatever reason, today at least, I am hopeful. 

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